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Intelligent funny Facebook status quotes. I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. If people are talking behind your back, then just fart. If I'm not back in five minutes, just wait longer…. You don't have to like me, I'm not a Facebook status.

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Funny Quotes. 132,733 likes · 69,927 talking about this. Sure, these Funny Quotes were coined by someone else, but go ahead and share their witty words yourse

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No prejudice; I hate everyone equally. Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason. ~Mark Twain. Freedom means the right to yell, "THEATRE!" in a crowded fire. Find more freedom quotes, or keep scrolling for silly social updates 🙂.

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Clever and Inspirational Quotes. "If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny, or they'll kill you." -Billy Wilder. "I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early." -Charles Lamb. "If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age." -George Burns.

Funny Facebook Status Haters on facebook funny status quote

Funny Facebook Quotes. These are some of the funny status quotes for Facebook that can impress you. Use our free AI FB status creator and select 'quotes', then give a topic to create unique and creative quotes. Chocolate, coffee, and men the richer, the better. No prejudice; I hate everyone equally.

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Never lower your standards for a guy; make him raise his standards for you! Love is deaf. You can't just tell someone you love them. You have to show it. Beauty is less important than quality. When a girl is in love, you can see it in her smile; when a guy is in love, you can see it in his eyes.

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So here are some funny Facebook status update ideas that you can borrow for your own account, from funny one liners to funny jokes to funny Facebook status updates about life.. Take a look online for suggested funny status material and search for the best funny quotes for Facebook status updates. Find inspiration in true and trusted.

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People who say "I hate to bother you" need to learn to hate it a little bit more. Facebook should have a limit on how many times a relationship status can be changed. After 3 times, it should change by default to "Unstable.". If your relationship status says, "It's complicated," then you should stop kidding yourself and change it.

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Be the ENTIRE problem. You think you love your family but suddenly there are three of you and one remaining slice of pizza. 7 billion people on the planet and I can only tolerate maybe 10. Making fun of someone you're angry with is childish. Be an adult and hit them with your car, instead.

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Daily Silly Status is your home to over 25,000 silly facebook statuses! Daily Silly Status has scoured the internet for the most witty statuses, silly statuses and down right funny statuses. We are pleased to now share our findings with you our Daily Silly Status readers. Enjoy our growing collection of over 25,000 silly statuses and share them.

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Really Funny Quotes for Facebook. We have some really funny quotes for Facebook that will definitely make your friends engaged with your status. If you want to embarrass a psychic, throw a surprise party; For 10 years now, I have said my best friends' names. Thanks to the words "man", "bro", and "dude".

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Find a funny Facebook status to use for yourself. The best funny status ideas and updates. Search random posts or submit your own. Post Randomonium. Hall Of Fame . Funny; Insightful; WTF. Random; FAQ; Dad Jokes; Submit. Log In. Funny Status Ideas #17841. I don't want to party like it's 1999, I want to grocery shop like it is 1999.

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Behind every successful status, there is Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V. Sometimes I drink water - just to surprise my liver. I live in fantasy so don't tell me your reality. Facebook is like the prison, you write on walls and get poked by people you don't know. You know what; the zoo is the best place to fart.

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Status Shuffle. 3,161,239 likes · 317 talking about this. Status Shuffle is the largest collection of funny Facebook status messages on the Internet! You can c

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The Cheesy Funny Facebook Statuses. I'm so cheesy, I'm not even sure if this is funny or not. I'm so corny, I'm not even sure if this is funny or not. I'm so lame, I'm not even sure if this is funny or not. But I just wanted to let you all know that I love you. I'm so sappy, I'm not even sure if this is funny or not.

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500+ Facebook Status About Life, Love, Friendship, Attitude & Fun. Having a Facebook status that resonates with everyone is always essential. Making the perfect choice for your Facebook status can make a significant impact on your profile. Whether you're sharing a status for your profile picture, selfie captions, videos, or posting funny.